The departure of a loved one is most often followed by funeral ceremonies, which may be held in a funeral home, cemetery, or religious venue like a church. As the moment approaches, many women question what is appropriate to wear to a funeral. Yves Légaré presents tips for selecting attire that is appropriate and respectful of the decorum.
Classic and Discreet Attire for a Funeral
After wondering what to do in case of death, the time comes to prepare for the ceremony. How to dress for a funeral? As a rule, favor sobriety with classic choices. It's not the time to showcase the latest additions to your wardrobe; attention should remain on reflection and the memory of the deceased.
Black or Dark Clothes: A Safe Bet
While conventions may vary, black is a safe choice. You can also opt for dark and discreet tones like gray and navy blue. A black funeral dress or a skirt paired with a black top are timeless choices. Ensure they cover the knees for a more conservative look. For those who prefer pants, an ensemble consisting of black pants and a button-up shirt, a simple blouse, or a plain sweater is an elegant and respectful option.
Short sleeves are generally acceptable, but it's advisable to avoid thin straps, especially for religious services. A black blazer can harmoniously complete the outfit while covering the shoulders. For outdoor ceremonies in cold weather, opt for a dark wool coat.
Funeral Attire According to Cultures and Religions
Christian Tradition: Sobriety and Dark Clothing
Funeral attire for women in the Christian tradition is characterized by simplicity and wearing black clothing. Generally, avoid patterns unless they are very discreet like thin stripes or subtle dots. In any case, casual or potentially deemed too sexy outfits should be avoided. Avoid wearing leather clothes, necklines, and tight clothes. In a church, plan to bring a shawl to cover your shoulders if wearing short sleeves.
Muslim Tradition: Modesty and Covering Clothing
While Islam doesn't set a specific rule regarding funeral attire for women, modesty remains key in the Muslim tradition. If attending Muslim funerals, opt for a long and loose outfit with a discreet color like white or black, accompanied by a headscarf covering the hair. The clothes should be loose and cover the arms, legs, and chest.
Jewish Tradition: Modesty and Dark Clothing
As in the Muslim tradition, arms and legs are covered, and sobriety is favored. Avoid flashy accessories and favor dark clothing.
Buddhist Tradition: Light Colors and Simplicity
Unlike other traditions, Buddhist ceremonies often favor white. This is especially true for close family members, as this color symbolizes purity and mourning. However, this color is often reserved for the family, with friends wearing black. The attire should reflect simplicity and respect; avoid wearing accessories.
Other Cultures and Traditions: Adapting Attire According to Local Customs
While dark colors are most common in the Western world, there are different local customs to consider. Some will opt for traditional attire; in certain African or Hawaiian communities, outfits will be more colorful. If attending the funeral of someone with an unfamiliar culture, it's advisable to inquire beforehand to adapt your funeral attire as a woman.
Mistakes to Avoid When Choosing Funeral Attire
Too Casual or Flashy Clothes
Whether opting for secular or religious funeral ceremonies, maintaining respectful attire remains important. Some families may be more open to color varieties, but at all costs, avoid appearing negligent or drawing attention to yourself. Faded or torn jeans and wrinkled clothes are to be avoided. Always favor clean and well-maintained outfits.
Also avoid deep necklines, tight dresses, very short skirts, or fishnet stockings. In case of uncertainty, opt for the most classic choices possible.
Flashy or Noisy Accessories
Jewelry is quite appropriate for a funeral, as long as it remains discreet and elegant. In your choice of accessories, also pay attention to bags and shoes. Avoid noisy high heels that would disturb the quiet in a moment of reflection. In your womanly funeral attire, also consider your comfort; you might spend long moments standing, and you may have to walk on grass.
Organizing a ceremony is often a key step in mourning and its stages, allowing to move towards acceptance.